Newborn and relationship problems
The birth of a new baby into a relationship is a festive occasion, and although couples plan for the arrival of the newborn baby they have to consider the potential relationship issues.
The main aim of any expecting or new parent should be to take care of the newborn. There are several times this activity of taking care of the new baby can be frustrating on a young or mature relationship.
In most instance the mom assumes the responsibility of ensuring everything is ok with the newborn child and as a result of this she becomes tired and frustrated. Usually in this instance her attention becomes focused on the newborn attempting to ensure that the baby is well taken care of and as a result she unknowingly neglects the husband.
Women and men are different and may react differently to situations. A mom will attempt to ensure the newborn needs are taken care of such as change diapers, feeding, bathing and nurturing. While the dad will respond to the newborn by ensuring their needs are taken care of financially, playing with the child and helping the mom where possible. Sometimes he provides his assistance via her requests so usually it can be more reactive than proactive which can later lead to other problems.
If the new mom is not getting the desired assistance to make this experience joyous and memorable she can become agitated toward her spouse. As a result she can act out in the following ways
- Your wife or girlfriend is overworked and as a result her desire for usual activities with the husband or boyfriend becomes limited or nonexistent.
- She gets frustrated because she constantly has to remind you of things to do and believes you should be proactive and want to do things for her.
It is very common that men also get frustrated and this is primarily because of the shift of attention from them to the newborn child. Yes, sometimes jealousy can occur and though not intentional this can be acted out in the wrong way if not addressed early.
If you, the new dad are not prepared for this drastic change because you are not educated about what it takes to be a parent and maintain a healthy relationship it can be a devastating shocker. Some guys act out in different ways some may include
- Working later than usual to avoid going home
- Getting angry when the baby cries.
- Do not speak a lot or at times at all.
Communication is essential in any relationship and in order for a new family to be happy there are some sacrifies that has to occur in order for things to work. Also understanding each other and applying that knowledge is key to having a successful relationship and happy baby.
Once both parties understand that pre- pregnancy and newborn the only components that existed were, the husband, the wife and the relationship. Now with the addition of a fourth component an extra effort has to be emphasized by both parties.
So in order for this understanding to be successful and to reduce arguments and frustration by both parties simple things can be applied.
For the husband and boyfriends simple things that the new mom will not be able to do he can try to assist where possible such as
- Wash baby bottles
- Ensure the baby garbage is wrapped up and thrown away regularly
- If possible wash clothes
- Spend time with the baby to allow the mom the opportunity to rest
- Be understanding and sensitive to your spouse needs